I’ve been meditating every day for 141 days straight now. And let me tell you it changed my life. In this post, I’m speaking from my personal experience so hopefully, mediation can change your life too.
I’m not here to convince you that you need to meditate, I’m here to inspire and share my path to becoming a true yogi. That was a joke, I’m no yogi and nor will I ever become one.
So how did I start out with meditating?
I’m going to be very honest with you guys. I started out meditating like most of you guys start out. I started with it because I kept hearing “successful” people on podcasts say that mediation is the thing that keeps them running/ sane. So being the sheepish person that I am I followed suit and started dipping my toes in the mediation springs. But I never really committed to it.
So to sum it up, I started because it was en vogue to meditate because guys like Sam Harris and Tim Ferris told everyone that mediation is the key.
And of course, I also wanted to be that startup guy that meditates. But I did it all wrong and I started it for the wrong reasons. And I would find that out a few years later.
You need a strong why to really get the benefits of meditating
When I first started out I really loved sitting in silence.
The power of mediation and silence really kicked in hard for me. My mind had been “ON” for almost 24 years straight and for the first time even (when I wasn’t sleeping) I was truly listening to my inner voice and thoughts.
This stuff was powerful. But still, I just couldn’t commit to it long term.
I would do it for a few days in a row and then I wouldn’t meditate for days or sometimes entire weeks. I had no routine and I was not committed to getting the most out of it. Logically meditating never formed into a habit.
(At this stage in my life, when I was 24 I did not know that building a habit – to where it becomes effortless – takes up tot 90/120 days. Now I know this and I use this timeframe to my advantage. Back to the story..)
I didn’t get myself to commit because I started out with the wrong reasons for starting it in the first place. My WHY for doing it wasn’t strong enough.
If you would have asked me then why I meditated I would give you a bullsh*t answer like: I do it because it gives me mental peace, but that was a boilerplate answer. It wasn’t the truth.
Only a strong reason would get me to commit.
The why will reveal itself
Trust me. Once you start meditating and you dabble with it for a few years, you will come across rough patches in your life just keeps hitting you in the face with a brick. Those are the times to start on your meditation habit-building journey.
Life is suffering, just like the Buddha said, so you’ll have to find ways to cope with it.
And 2018 was a rough patch for me. I was stressed out and on the brink of a total mental collapse. So I dropped everything that I was doing, no side projects, no nothing, even no sports and physical activities.
I was allowed to do two things: 1) Do my work (because my company still needed me. I couldn’t just leave); 2) and meditate (as much as needed in the day).
And so I did. I still have the logs. I started meditating 4-5 times a day. The sessions where from 5 to 20 minutes long and I dropped the gimmicky Headspace and Calm apps for Insight Timer. The awesome Insight Timer app was recommended to me by a dear friend: Bas Snippert.
Bas is a superb stress and vitality coach, so check out his website here. And I’m still using Insight Timer to this day. As a matter of fact, I have need using it today for 3 times already.
Meditation for me at this moment in my life is entirely effortless and I enjoy it so much that I look forward to it. It’s my silent time where I can just focus on me and that feels great. It is like giving yourself a mental present.
See what changed? I had a strong why. I needed to get myself back together and I just knew and I just felt that meditating would get me there. Silence can never harm but only heal. You just need to give it time. And like everything in life, it’s a skill that you need to commit to.
So the WHY in 2018 was strong and real because life hit me hard that year.
I used mediation to calm myself down and I used it as a grounding tool when I overheated from the stresses of the day. And now I can say that it worked. I feel much better and things are going in the right direction.
So what now?
Everyone’s reason for committing to mediation will be different and that is a good thing. For me, it was the mental overheating from the daily stresses of entrepreneurship at a young age.
(No one teaches you how to cope with the stresses of paying salaries to 7 guys that have families and depend on you for their livelihood. So I needed to adapt or be crushed.)
For you, it can be the stresses that your boss gives you every day of the week. It doesn’t matter. As long as you feel an inner fire and a burning desire. You will fail when you do it just because you want to do it.
If you commit to it, you will find the benefits.
You won’t make it into a strong habit when you’re trying to force it on yourself without having a strong reason to really get it.
So what is you WHY? Answer these questions:
Why do you need meditation in your life? Can you think of a good reason why you need a calming moment during the day? Or maybe to start out the day with a focussed mind? Is your why strong enough? Will it push you to go for that 120 days streak?
My why was strong enough to push me because it felt like a matter of life and death. Why do you need it?
Lastly, only after you found a solid reason for committing, grab a pen and around 10 sticky notes and write the same sentence on all of the sticky notes: I’m training the habit of meditation because I need it too….. your text here…
After you’re done with that, crumble up the sticky notes into small balls in the palm of your hand. You should have 10 little sticky note balls in front of you.
Now throw the sticky notes into crevasses or places where you’ll be on a daily basis. Put them in the pockets of your clothes and your jacket. On your chairs, wherever you see them often to remind yourself of your habit-building challenge.
Try it and see where it takes you.
And remember, if your WHY is not strong enough yet, don’t stress about it. It will reveal itself to you. Just be patient. Life will throw a curveball at you, you just wait.
Good luck and have a good one and I will speak to you soon!
